Step one: Pack the effing car.
Step two: Make sure the effing car isn’t a safety hazard.
Step three: Adjust the effing radio. Watch for the effing box.
Step four: Drive the couch effing home without missing an effing shift.
Step five: Stop outside your apartment and open your effing doors.
Step six: Push the effing box out of the effing car.
Step seven: Push the effing box up the effing stairs.
Step eight: Place the effing box where the effing couch is going.
Step nine: Pour an effing glass of effing wine from a bottle that effing leaks through the weirdest effing chip in the effing bottle.
Step ten: Open the effing boxes.
Step eleven: Assemble the effing couch.
Step twelve: Look at the effing couch you put together.
Step thirteen: Christen the effing couch!